Corinne's Blog

I’m sitting in Starbucks drinking a chai tea & the main song from ‘Once’ came on andamp; I couldn’t help but Cry because they both started w/ Leo.

I first tasted Chai tea when Leo introduced it to me in October 2009

And I first watched Once cuddled up with Leo on the couch at his house in Minneapolis…I remember I sat there and thought the story was so sweet it made me cry. Now I’m crying for a different reason.

I miss Leo a lot.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CoSL_qayMCc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkFB8f8bzbY

I hate you with everything in me.
I wish you’d burn in hell slowly
I hope every time you think of me you suffer.
I hate that I ever knew you at all.
I hate that you are the way you are and that I took all that time and effort in my life to love you.
You’re the most evil person I’ve ever known and I wish you’d die.
I want to stab you with a thousand swords until you are a pile of mush.
I hate your accent and your fat face.
I hate your attitude and I hope you suffer when you realize that you will never find anyone who is anything like me.
I am the best thing that will ever happen to you and you’re lucky you found someone who was as willing to sacrifice and wait for you.
You have lost a friend in me and as of today you are dead to me.
I hate that God gave you life.
I hate the way you smell
I hate the music you introduced me to
I hate all the memories that I am now haunted with of my relationship with you
I hate that my heart has your name tattooed on it.
I hate that you are the only thing I can dream of and that I need to drug myself to get a peaceful night without thoughts of you.
I have had thoughts of jumping in front of a bus and ending my life because of the sadness you’ve brought me but I realize that you aren’t worth it.
You never put forth the effort to love me like I loved you
You never even tried to save our relationship
You were constantly a lousy boyfriend and it is only now that I am beginning to see that.
I want to send an atomic bomb to blow you up
And I want to cut off your manhood.
I want you to feel humiliation and all the pains of the world.
I wish you all the worst with every atom that makes up my body.
I hate the way you smile and the way your eyes look when you get tired.
I hate my computer and what it has become to me since I got to know you
I hate every minute I wasted on getting to know you.
I hate the plans for a future with you that I dreamed of.
I hate that you’d make a great father and I hope you are lonely for the rest of your life.
If you do find someone else I hope she’s terrible to you
I hope your children and children’s children turn out ugly
I hope you die in a terrible accident where you feel every bit of pain that you deserve.
I hate you and I wish you’d never been born.
I hope you get poisoned or shot.
I wish snakes would bite you and that the venom would kill you from the inside out.
I hope you remain lonely for the rest of your life and that everyday you are lonely you think of me and realize how you left a good thing.
You are dead to me and I never want to see your face or hear your name uttered again.

You are Dead to me
And I will try not to mourn you because you’re evil and you don’t deserve that energy.
You’re a waste of my time.

Last night I was involved in an aggravated robbery. Personally I’m not really out of shock yet.

In order for me to understand this I had to look up what a robbery really was…wiki says:
Robbery is the crime of taking or attempting to take something of value by force or threat of force and/or by putting the victim in fear. At common law, robbery is defined as taking the property of another, with the intent to permanently deprive the person of that property, by means of force or fear.[1] Precise definitions of the offence may vary between jurisdictions. Robbery differs from simple theft in its use of violence and intimidation.

The word “rob” came via French from Late Latin words (e.g. deraubare) of Germanic origin, from Common Germanic raub — “theft”

Among the types of robbery are piracy, armed robbery involving use of a weapon, and aggravated robbery involving use of a deadly weapon or something that appears to be a deadly weapon.

……

I was headed home on a 14 bus after having just caught a 46 from work. Mom was going to pick me up but I’d miss her while I was looking for my cellphone…she’d left and I’d decided to take a bus instead. I’d called her and said “Hey mom I’m going to take a 46, you don’t have to come, I’d have to wait to long for you to come back.”

So I was on the 46 and there was a young boy on who talked to me about his toys. And I had a great conversation about going into the arts in education with Alexander Kleinschmidt who Connor Trip would have introduced me to. I got off that bus with a smile on my face loving that a person could have a genuine conversation with complete strangers.

Then I got on a 14 and I called my buddy Vince to see how he was doing at work…we talked about how I really loved children and how I’d probably be old before I was able to have them. Vince was making a joke about how I’d be 80 before I had my first grandchild and I was laughing and walking down 32nd street the five blocks from the bus stop on Bloomington to my house on 32nd and Longfellow when from behind me a black man with a gun came up to me and told me to drop everything (My bag, my violin and my phone) and to hand them all over.

Vince said that all I was saying all of a sudden was ‘Oh my God…’ over and over again before the phone cut off. I remember saying ‘please don’t do this.’

The black man had a black jacket on and I remember staring at the gun and looking up at his face. It was covered in a scarf and all I could remember really was his eyes and again the gun…I looked down the street and there were people standing by the alley I’d just passed. I wanted to call out to them for help but the gun was on me…then the guy he grabbed my things and he walked and joined the other two men…his voice sounded like he was my age. He and the other two casually walked down the alley…I didn’t follow them because they had a gun and I was afraid.

A car came down the road and I jumped into the street and tried to flag it down saying “I was just robbed at gunpoint, please call the cops and let me in your car…I’m afraid!”

She didn’t open her car but I think she did begin to call the cops.
Then another car came and I ran to their car “Please let me in I asked, I was just robbed and they have a gun and I’m scared.”

I talked to the dispatcher and discovered that the woman’s name was Donna in the silver Audi and that she’d also called the cops.
The cops came and we went down the alley and there was no sign…I thought about how my friend Vincent might be reacting thinking I all of a sudden disappeared. I thought about what they took…my IDs, my keys…they know where I live!

I’m scared and a bit jumpy…the cops let me in their car to warm myself because I was cold. I tried to tell them as much as I could about the perps and their outfits…but I just remembered my things and the gun…they took my everything.

Everything really but my life…I got away with my life and the clothing on my back.

What if I would have died.
They would have discovered my body in the street.
They would have had me in my Hamline sweatshirt and my orchestra t-shirt, and my Corinne bracelet and the bracelet I’d made in my beading option.

They would have discovered me wearing my hair in braids and pigtails with a gunshot in my chest where the gun had been pointed when I was robbed.

They would have discovered my bus card in my pocket and could have looked at video of my trips on the buses as evidence of when I’d just gotten off the buses…then they would have tracked me back to work and how I’d been looking for my cellphone in the fridge and had therefore missed my mother.

I would have left behind a dirty room and a lot of unfinished business…I could have seen James but I went and babysat a woman with Alzheimers instead…I lent my mother money as one of my last good deeds. I’d told my friend Connor a friendly goodbye on the bus and I’d enjoyed a wonderful day at work at Burroughs Community Elementary School.

I would have had potential to be a great nurse with a future in wanting to work with children…the children would probably remember me and people would say I was good with them.

But I got away with my life…luckily.

And I lost some of my most valuable possessions in the process.

My computer, I just got it back from Jeremy.

My violin, the same one I’ve had my whole life since I’d first begun to play in 6th grade at the age of 11.

My cellphone, which I got last Christmas which still held the number of my friend Leo Kohorst who was just murdered a month ago tomorrow.

My nurses packets…and pieces of myself in novel form.

I forget what else other than my Ids…I’m a donor and my library card.

I would have been fighting with my boyfriend having left him a message saying that I wanted to talk to him.

I would have just responded to a text from my friend Jeremy where he’d have asked me what I was up to.

Everyone says I did the right thing in letting those things go even though they had value to me.

Because my life has more value…I couldn’t sleep last night in thinking that I’d just had a brush with death and I hadn’t thought about anyone and I’d been alone and scared.

Everyone keeps saying that I was lucky because I could be dead…I’m lucky because I did what they said, I wasn’t a hero and I didn’t fight back…I wasn’t a hero I was a victim with walked away with her life.

I wish I’d been stronger and more aware of my surroundings, I wish I hadn’t been laughing on the phone with Vince and that I’d been looking around me and rushing home. I wish i’d heard them and known the gun was there…I wish I had a tazor or mace.

I wish I knew self defense to fight them off…

But it is all different with a weapon…a deadly weapon is involved…I wonder if it was loaded, I wonder where they got it or if it was real…it looked real, but it was dark…it looked like a real heavy hand gun.

What do I know, I’ve never seen a gun out of a police officer’s holster.

My uncle Sean says now I am officially urban and that I’ve spent to much of my time in Edina and that I’m too trusting of people.

This is going to make me paranoid and I’m afraid to walk at night off the bus alone already.

Today I took a break from my life, I’m missing work and clinicals to think about my life and if I had died last night.

I have so many shoulda woulda couldas…I keep calling the police office to give them more information…apparently if they try to pawn my stuff I can get it back. Hopefully the pawn shops won’t be dirty.

Gosh so much to say and my mind is all over the place.

If anyone needs me email me at Pinker33@gmail.com

My cell is gone…but I can still check at the library, wow…they even took my library card!

>I need to stop living out of my purse.

Today was an interesting day, even though I was unable to attend his funeral Leo Kohorst my friend has been on my mind the whole day.

First it began with my thoughts this morning as I woke up, I’d gotten home around 11pm after being dropped off by Leo’s Augsome friends, we’d carpooled together to farming MN to attend Leo’s wake. In getting up this morning I associated my complete exhaustion to the energy it took to actually let loose and have fun remembering Leo. In the car on the way back home from the wake after stopping for a bite to eat, we ladies in Elisabeth’s car had a total blast!…I did things I’ve never done before…talking to random people while stuck for an hour in traffic, trying to sing songs out loud while totally not knowing the words…letting my memories of Leo simply stream out of my head in sort of coherent sentences. My first thoughts of Leo this morning were of the pure sunshine he brought into my life…my second thoughts were on how frickin’ cold my bedroom is at 4 in the morning.

When I was walking to the bus stop I had to pass Leo’s house which sits with every light in the house still on full blast…exposing every inch of it’s interior to be viewed as it slowly begins to decay under the elements. In this I felt sadness, I want to go into Leo’s house and turn off all the lights and place a single candle in the window that is the smell of chai…welcoming Leo’s spirit to come and visit whenever he feels…it is his home after all.

As I sat at the bus stop freezing and watching my own breath I was reminded of the numerous times I’d leave Leo’s house slamming the automatically locking back door as I blindly headed out somewhere…only to remember that I’d forgotten something that was essential…forcing me in the cold to have to turn back and figure out another way into the house …at which time I usually missed my bus and became extremely late. Those days I remembered calling Leo up and asking him if he could stop by his house in between classes to open his door so I could get back in.
“Is Tom home?” Leo would ask…”He can let you in.”
Of course Tom wouldn’t be home and I’d respond depressingly
“If he was home would I be calling you now?”
at which time I’d hear the sigh from the other end of the phone and Leo’d break and say:
“I’ll be there in a half an hour.”
He’d pedal back to me and unlock the door and I’d be relieved to be inside to get my possessions but also because by this time standing in the freezing cold I often want and need to pee terribly.

As I sat at the bus stop I also remembered sitting there with Leo waiting on a 22 or a 21 to go to Saint Paul or downtown…Whenever I pass Leo’s block in the car or the bus I used to say…Hey there’s Tom and Leo’s house…which eventually became, hey there’s Leo’s house when Tom moved out.

While I was on the bus I saw a man wearing a hat that looked just like the hat Leo bought me while I was in farming. the man wore his hat with a silent pleasure most stylish hat wearers wear and you might call it a stretch but I thought of how much Leo loved his blue hat, and how we had decided it was the best look on him together when Leo wore it he had that kind of calm feeling about him.

As I was at work at school the time of day definitely was on my mind…the funeral started at 11am and I was working from 6:30-12. I was kind of happy to see that when the sun finally came up the day began to warm, even though it may have just been for the afternoon I felt it was appropriate for a day such as today, clear skies and sunny…my friend needed good weather because bad weather would have been depressing.

As I was right about to leave I was stopped by my boss who told me that she’d seen the news…after a short conversation in which I told her about what a great guy Leo was as I’ve been telling everyone I talk about him to she told me that he would now be my guardian angel looking out for me in heaven.

As I walked to the bus stop I spoke to God and Leo and surprisingly I found myself speaking (out loud) to myself. I told Leo that I know he hadn’t had the option to pick to be my guardian angel watching over me from heaven. But, also that I couldn’t have picked a better more responsible person to have my back. He’d probably saved my life numerous times since his death and I’d have never known it. It is nice to think that Leo is out being an angel to watch and help guide me…give me a sign that you’re still around I asked him, even though I expected nothing. Because of my conversation with my boss, and my talking to myself…I didn’t make my bus in time and I sat at the bus stop thinking about my memories of Leo and this new “guardian” concept till it finally came.

I was on a really tight schedule today, I had to get to an appointment. The appointment was at the doctors to have a follow up appointment to one I’d had on Wednesday, the appointment was at 1 and by the time i got on the bus is was already 12:36. Like a miracle I caught three buses in a row right after one another…getting me to Lake and Chicago at around 12:49.

Off Lake and Chicago I accidentally got on the wrong bus because I was so rushed into getting on a 5 that I didn’t pay attention to which 5 I was getting on and I realized a little too late that the bus only got halfway to my destination. My feet in my new shoes really hurt all of a sudden so I decided not to walk the ten blocks to the doctor’s office. It was 1:13 and I was almost 15 minutes late. As I waited at a bus stop I asked a woman when the bus would be coming…she was standing with a young girl and a baby in a carriage. The woman was white and the children looked mixed so I assumed they were hers. I was surprised when a random man walked up to the young 10 year old girl and gave her a hug and kiss. He said something like “I told you I wouldn’t be late” and he stood at the stop with the girl and woman and baby and they looked to be a cute little couple. The man tried to grab the woman’s jacket when he hugged her and she treated him to let go…then out of the blue he says something like…”If I can’t pull your jacket I’ll just pull hers” and he pointed at me the silent person at the corner and he smiled. I was shocked to suddenly be a part of the conversation and when he saw that he’d gotten my attention in pointing to me he started to spark up a conversation about how it was his daughter birthday and that he was taking her to the American Girl doll store to buy a 95$ doll for her. I told him how that was age appropriate and he went on about how there was a lack of age appropriateness and how as a father he was over controlling and protective of his beautiful daughter against potential boys (though she was only 10) I could clearly see that his daughter was pretty at her young age and would only grow into her looks. He went on also to talk about how times have changed from when he and I were growing up and how nothing in the world was ever safe anymore. He told me about how his brother had been killed on the block previous and how that’s what the world has become…and as if out of some corny play he said “This world isn’t what it used to be, just last night I saw in the news a story about a man who beat his poor young landlord to death for evicting him.” And that was my sign, I told the man that I knew Leo ‘the landlord’ and I told him how I was missing his funeral as we spoke and waited for the bus. He asked me why and where I was going and I told him to the doctors…then he asked some more whys and I explained how if I didn’t get my mantose that I couldn’t become a nurse for a very long time. He told me about how funerals aren’t nessecary for a person to be remembered or let go of. He told me a story of how he missed his murdered brother’s funeral and how he remembered that the night his brother had died he’d offered to take his brother out drinking and had been declined for the first time on an offer like that. This guy also told me about how a person should be remembered in the good memories and that having to go to the doctors is fucked up when a friend is being laid to rest. I thanked the man for this sympathy and I thought of Leo.

At the doctor’s office when I finally got there almost an hour late at 1:54 I was happily greeted by a man who was wearing a vikings jersey at work…I thought of Leo.

Before getting my mantose read for school. The nurse asked me how I was, and I told her I was lost in thoughts…and when she acquired I told her about my thoughts of Leo during the day so far and she told me a story of her own that was extremely comforting and hard to share…the nurse stopped to talk to me, then she forgot she’d lost track of time and she returned to work.

When the mantose lady came in and checked my arm for any proof and it came out negative, I felt it was a little waste of my time to miss the funeral for something that only took 5 seconds. The nurse asked me about my large depressed sigh and I told her my thoughts on missing Leo’s funeral. Then she told me she was sorry and we talked about nursing school.

Then on my bus ride home these kids were playing a hand game in Spanish and they came next to me and their accents were really strong for their ages. I asked one of the children where they were from and she answer Nicaragua. That was the same place Leo was trying to create sustainable energy source for.

After my appointment as I walked the 2 blocks home I saw Leo’s house and I scanned the ground. On the ground there was a shiny white rock…and unlike the rocks I picked last night at the wake to help me remember Leo but this rock was really nice and instantly I thought. “This rock is more fitting to Leo than that other one.” So I took it home with me.

When I got home my housemates friends were over in the backyard playing RISK…Leo taught me how to play Risk.

When I went upstairs I saw Nick’s pullover sweater,and Leo had the same style but in blue instead of Red.

Then I saw Nick’s room…and it looked just like Leo’s used to…with musical instruments and books everywhere (sadly no accordion)

Then I realized what was happening…I was getting all of this because Leo wanted to me to remember him and our great times together.

I put the rock away and began writing this blog, but it doesn’t end there…through the window I watched as the RISK game continued, I thought of my times with Leo and I gave up with my blogging and stepped away from the computer to go and take a sneak peak at the back porch and the game. I ended up staying out there for the rest of the game to watch the winner win and I talked with the boys about Cowboy Bebop and how it was like Firefly and I made quick friends with Ben and Aaron Fitch and a guy named Maurice.

Aaron complained of his hunger and how he needed to get rid of some potatoes that some nuns had given him and as I stood in the kitchen it hit me that Leo was sending me another memory. I remembered Leo having a bag of potatoes and all we could think to do was bake them and make them into soup. I remember making the soup and having Leo and Tom eat it and enjoy it. So, Like old times I offered to make sometime soup because I had mixed vegetables and carrots and time, since it is now Friday and I have no work or anything tomorrow.

Aaron said sure and I started water and boiled chicken to make broth and Aaron left to get potatoes…when he returned with them he helped me wash them and dry them and cut them and this I added them to the soup.

The boys went out to play ping pong in the garage and it reminded me of Leo’s ping pong table we play beer pong on.

When the soup was done Aaron, Ben and sat down and ate a meal together. During one point in the conversation I looked over and remembered I left the computer up and running with the blog still up and i smiled. Aaron asked me why I was smiling and I told him that I got a little bit of Leo in everything in my life right now.

And I explained to Ben and Aaron how each of my housemates had a Leo quality in them that reminded me of Leo when I interacted with them. Part of why I moved in so quickly.

And we talked about Leo and the whole situation and that because a conversation about ‘house rules’ and what rules are made to be broken in a house and what rules should be followed.

Then we talked about substance abuse and weed and gangs and bad lifestyles.

And then i discovered I worked with the boy’s mutual friend and his girlfriend. The co-worker was totally ‘different’ since he’d be dating my other co-worker. I’d noticed that they were close but I’d never realized that they’d been dating.

So…we spent the rest of the night talking about random stuff and the boys left laughing and joking and they said.

“If you ever want to hangout you know you can contact us…and we exchanged information.” Then they left.

So I’m sitting here now thinking of how I just had a great home cooked meal like the type I used to have in Leo’s house to end my day.

So I thought I’d share this…because I don’t think it’s a mistake that Leo is still ever present in my everyday life, in all the sweet reminders. (Like when Leo would leave me little notes reminding me to lock up before I left.)

Wow, that’s a lot of typing *yawn* goodnight internet!

I think tonight went well.
I got to bond with Leo’s friends from Augsburg and I think our feelings of grief together have created a bond of friendship between all of us that is deeper than we all can tell.
I feel I bonded with Leo’s High school friends, It was nice to hear the stories and see how his friends chipped into to help provide for Leo’s family…I wish I could have done more than just saying I’m sorry.
I guess I can try to help them here with Leo’s house, I do know it like the back of my hand and I do only live three blocks away…making me Leo’s closest friend in relation to where his house is.
I feel that in all of this I have learned that laughing is not a sign of disrespect in a church where people are mourning…but when its because you are remembering a person’s sense of humor or fun and friendly personality and you are filled with rapturous joy at the slightest memory…than its okay to chuckle.

All of us friends agreed that we loved Leo’s silent chuckle…the way he’d throw back his head and lightly laugh…we all knew it well for we had once laughed with him. I know he was laughing with us tonight from heaven…probably laughing happily that he brought all of us together.

The only part I had a hard time with was seeing Leo’s body, for the Leo in the casket wasn’t the friend I found myself instantly loving.

The body in the casket was like an empty shell or a wax figure; totally lifeless and not what I want to remember Leo as.

I kept wanting that empty shell to in a way…get up.

Leo was anything but lifeless.
The Leo I want to remember was full of an abundance of life that was like the sun…every person Leo’s light shined on felt filled with his spirit and good energy.

Leo was looking for new sustainable energy sources and I feel that he was my energy source…
I found a power in his friendship that was stronger than anything any other outlet could provide.
I feel that God gave Leo his energy and that God has decided to allow us all to remember and feel that energy when we remember Leo.

When I went to the wake tonight I felt Leo’s energy in all of his friends and family and though we haven’t realized our full potentials to shine his light yet and we are still dull

I feel that together we can shine like a beacon of Love for all those we touch. We can share Leo’s energy of love with all those we Meet.

Leo Kohorst you are like the sun to me.

I hope I can wake my inner energy to be more like you.

I have plenty of memories to share about Leo Kohorst…he was a great friend.

I met Leo through Tom Orbison his former roommate from college. Tom had invited me to a party to promote new housemates at the house and Leo was the one who came and picked me up. I remember Leo was driving with Tom in his old raggedy van that he’d acquired from his parent’s transportation service. I remember Leo saying that because the van looked shady it was called the molester mobile it looked like something a kidnapper would drive.

My first impression of Leo was that he was super cute and right away I took a liking to his sense of humor.

When we got back to the house Leo told me about how he’d bought it and how he had big plans to fix it up, he’d only lived there for a few months and it was just the end of summer and the beginning of fall and he told me of all his plans for having roommates to help maintain the house till he was done with College and how he’d then move out of it and sell it for the value of the work he put into it.

Playing Games

I was amazed that someone so young had taken on so much responsibility. After playing Tom and Leo in Guitar hero I helped them clean and prepare for the party.

I think my friendship with Leo was a lot like his house, as he added more of himself to his house I began to feel more at home with our friendship.

That first night at the party I remember trying to teach Leo how to salsa dance. He was so rhythmically challenged that it simply made me laugh. I stepped on his toes a few times and he apologized for having two left feet.

It was Leo’s attitude that night that made me feel like I was his instant friend and that I could be friends with him for a long time after.

I have to admit that at first I had a huge crush on Leo and that’s why I found myself hanging out at his house so much. I would often confide in Tom that I wanted to ask Leo out but he was so dedicated to his schoolwork that I didn’t want to ruin his groove. Like a lovesick puppy I even wrote him a love letter once labeled “My Current Subject of Intrigue” (it can be found now on my blog Pinker33.com) at which time he wrote me back the perfect response saying that he’d leave our relationship open for interpretation. I remember telling Leo that if I didn’t have a boyfriend when I’d first met him that I would have tried to hit on him for sure. In response Leo just smiled and said, “Thanks.”
After a few weeks we decided it would be best simply to be friends.

Leo came into my life at a time that I was out of school and looking for a job. I didn’t have any friends and I’d become somewhat of a hermit. Leo and Tom both made me feel welcomed in both their home and definitely as friends.

I remember when I was looking for a job and living out in Brooklyn Park I would call Leo up and ask him if I could crash on his couch because I didn’t want to have to commute back home late at night by myself. Leo always said yes and it became a part of my weekend routine.

My Asking to come over routine (audio)

I would spend my Sundays with the boys watching Sunday afternoon football, getting out of church with just enough time to catch the end of the game. Leo would fill me in on the beginning and after the game I would watch a movie or play guitar hero until the night when I’d have my church small group. Leo would always lend me his bike to get to small group trusting that I’d bring it back in one piece. After my small group I’d bike back to the house where Leo would usually have some kind of dinner for me to munch on. Then I’d settle into my place on the houses white couch.

Leo’s house became my home away from home and Tom and Leo became my family. At the time I could not afford to live at the house with the boys. Leo and I had discussed it and Leo told me that he would hate to have to jeopardize our friendship if I had moved in and couldn’t pay rent. He was very understanding of my situation.

In exchange for a place on the couch on weekends Leo graciously accepted the only thing I could offer him, which were my cleaning and cooking skills. I would clean the house or make dinner and Leo wouldn’t mind my being there. Because I had a place to stay I was able to find a job in the city.

Leo the Handyman (audio)
I remember one night I’d made dinner for Leo only because Tom was away at his dad’s house. I’d tried experimenting with making pasta sauce out of some tomatoes Leo had brought down to the cities from his parent’s garden. I think the tomatoes had gone bad because I tried it and instantly I wanted to throw the whole concoction away. But Leo wouldn’t let me and he helped himself to my pasta sauce and ate every bite, telling me as I scolded him saying “I can’t believe you’re eating that..” that he “wasn’t a picky eater and that in his house back home in farming nothing went to waste.” He ate the whole dish and ever licked up the rest. To this day I will always remember that he had a smile on his face as he did it, like it was a gourmet meal.

When I’d come over and hangout at the house on Saturdays I remember Leo, Tom and I would watch Movies, play Risk and Scrabble and listening to music. As Leo and I would wash dishes we would discuss our similar music tastes. It was Leo who introduced me to some of my now favorite musicians such as Rufus Wainwright, Sufjan Steven and St.Vincent…Leo helped me perfect my playlist.
I used to sit at the bottom of the stairs when he didn’t know I was listening and listen to him practice his piano and sing with his guitar…he was so talented and sometimes when he played I would cry from the pure joy his playing brought my spirit.
Leo on Sunday nights would often barricade himself into his room to study and I remember he’d always study with a cup of chai or a can of beer at his desk. I remember asking him about it once and he told me it was a great way for him to mellow out and focus on the books, I have tried it and it really works!

Leo and I would play scrabble together and he’d always win…I think he let me win once but he was always like 300 points ahead of me, but he provided me with my most challenging Scrabble games.

Halloween, Corinne the Socialist, Losing it.

I remember at Halloween when he was A dick in the box, based on the Lonely Island song…and it never got old…us singing is as we walked.

I remember watching the Twins and the Vikings doing well last season…jumping up and down when they won and feeling terrible when they lost the super bowl.

I watched District 9 with Leo for the first time and we snuggled together on the couch and discussed it after wards…it was funny because he had one with Turkish Alien subtitles because he’d pirated it, and he spent the whole movie telling me what the Aliens were saying in his own way.

I remember he showed me how to milk a cow.

There was one time when I’d brought my suitcase over to the house because I’d been using it at my mom’s house and Leo and Tom hid it from me…then they filmed my reaction when they told me they’d hid it in the garage. I totally freaked out but that’s the only recording of his voice I can really listen to outside of his voice mail message.

I remember Leo’s alarm used to be the song from willy wonka “hee hee hee hee hoo hoo hoo Willy wonka, willy wonka thee amazing chocolatier Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka everybody give a cheer!” and his phone’s ringtone was a Rufus wainwright song “My phones on vibrate for you….”

When he fixed his back light on the house we got all the cords mixed up…

I remember being in Farming Minnesota and going through records with Leo on the racks in Savers, While we were in savers that day Leo pointed out every item his family had donated and it made me smile because Leo went on about how Savers was one of the best establishments to shop…he would shop there constantly.

I remember installing the doorbell and asking Leo to come outside and try it for the first time.

Leo used to leave me all these really super sweet reminders to lock up when I would crash on his couch.

I remember Leo made me breakfast on couch and how happy I was to receive breakfast like that from a male for the first time.

WHEN THE CAR BROKE DOWN (Audio)

I would fake sleep in the mornings sometimes so i could watch Leo tiptoeing around me getting ready for his morning classes. I would always conveniently wake up just at the tale end of his reading his emails to say good morning and wish him a good day. Sometimes we’d have some toast to start the morning off.

I remember Leo’s strange tastes in sandwiches…like peanut butter, banana and mustard…it was the strangest thing.

I remember trying to convince Leo Kohorst that getting a cat for his mouse problem would be a good idea,  but he was convinced that cats belonged outside because he’d never been used to the cityfied house trained cats that I grew up with, he’d only encountered farm cats. When i would try to convince him how cute cats were when he came over to my place he’d turn around and tell me about all the animals that he’d had and killed as he was growing up on the farm.

Leo would blindly buy what I told him to at the grocery store and he told me he’d never cooked for himself before so he trusted me…I liked that.