Corinne's Blog

http://www.stylemepretty.com/2010/06/22/wedding-window/

Have you ever had that dream where you are screaming at the top of your lungs and nothing comes out?

I’ve experienced that in real life when I got my tonsils taken out when I was six or seven but it keeps happening to me now that I’m 20 in my dreams.

It isn't really a nightmare, but there is pain in it.

I keep having a reoccurring dream where I’m hurt in some way or I’m trying to save someone who is in danger and I find that I can’t vocalize what the problem is. In my dream I am completely unable to talk whatsoever and I find myself resorting to sign language in order to communicate. The dreams feel so real that when I wake up I find myself not talking for hours until someone talks to me first then in the real world I discover I have a voice that comes from my voice box which I seem to be missing completely in the dream.

In the dream the people who i communicate with sometimes understand what I am saying when others have no clue and need an interpreter. Some people choose to ignore me completely when I am without a voice but since it is my dream I always find a way to get their attention.

I told my mother about it and she told me that she thinks its because I constantly think there are things I should be saying that I never say and because in real life I can’t get them out I find myself acting out.

I find it strange that I find myself using my second language more in my sleep than I do in the real world. Maybe my mind is practicing so it doesn’t lose that talent.

Some people believe, myself being one of them that dream can tell you messages about the future. I believe it because of Joseph in the Bible and what his dreams and the dreams of the king said about the 7 years of good harvest and 7 years of famine. I’m really hoping though that I won’t have to experience a pain anytime soon that would make me not able to communicate to those around me, like my voice box being taken out completely.

I wonder what other things this dream might mean.

If you have an answer leave it in a comment below:

Corinne Salone | Create Your Badge

My mom reordered the cable from Comcast for the house because she wanted to be able to watch the third season of True Blood with me. She’s an addict to the show and I enjoy being a fan with her.

But cable turns my siblings into animals. Especially my little sister cynthia who is already a major pain in the ass.

She has cable in her own room and still she’d wrestling with me for the television remote in th living room. I literally had to bite her to get her off my back as she literally smothered me with a couch pillow. She doesn’t know her own strength and at 11 she’d like a giant hulking dangerous animal. She needs to get the crap kicked out of her one day just to know she shouldn’t be physical with everyone.

my mom made a rule that Cynthia has to read a book and that no television was allowed today until she said so.

I’m fine with it because I am perfectly content with my computer, the internet and music.

She has my old television and I’m tempted to take it out of her room because she’s sneaking television and she doesn’t deserve any after acting like such a little monster.

Gosh, I just wish I had my own place so I could get cable there and watch whatever I wanted to without the fight over the remote.

Gosh Cynthia is a major brat.

So you all know that I’ve gotten a job since being deported. I was working as a Personal Care Attendant to a seven year old boy named John under his father Yahya Rachman’s employment. While i was working with John and for Yahya I was invited to stay at their residence free of charge because at the time I was shacked up on my mother’s couch and looking for an apt. I agreed and in exchange for my living there I would do simple housework like folding clothes, putting clothing away and making beds. All of which I have no trouble doing because I’ve had positions where I had to do the same. Working with little John had it’s ups and downs but it was never has hard as working for his father.

Yahya is completely the defined meaning of ignorant. His ignorance is in anything that is beyond his fourth grade comprehension level. If something isn’t beneficial to him personally it has no means of being in his house. That is sad because his son suffers from a lack of attention and the love he needs doesn’t come from his father. Yahya sits on his ass all day playing the system while he’s on welfare, he doesn’t have a job, he has no insurance on his cars, 11 children with multiple woman and only one child lives with him. My mom thinks he was a former drug dealing pimp. While I was under his employment he would insult me when he complimented me. And he’d be manipulating in order to get what he wanted even on my days off I found myself working just to shut him up. Yahya is completely content just having his seven year old son John watching television all day, because he himself watches television all day. While I worked as John’s PCA i helped him with his spelling and behavior and I took him to the park daily, I would wake up early to get John dress and on the bus and I would read him bedtime stories at night. I ignored Yahya for the sake of the child.

But on Monday the 7th Yahya approached me and demanded half of my paycheck because supposedly I owed him. I didn’t owe him anything except my gratitude and ten dollars I had borrowed last week.

The reason Yahya asked me for the money is that before I had begun working for Yahya my mother had been planning on working for him. My mother needed a second job and Yahya wanted to hire her as John’s PCA at the time I had been planning my trip to Scotland that didn’t end up happening because of my deportation. In their agreement my mother would watch John after school when he got home and Yahya would pay her with the hours he put in with the PCA company. Yahya’s plan was to lie to the company and submit full hours every time my mother worked even if she didn’t work more than ten hours a week. He would pay my mother for what she worked and he’d keep the rest of the money for himself. When I began working for him instead of my mother he decided to carry this agreement on to me, when I’d not agreed to anything. When I picked up my own check after having worked above and beyond what I’d been hired to do. He demanded what I owed him which was nothing because i’d done all the work and he’d sat on his ass.

He wanted to commit fraud and when I refused to give him ‘his money’ he was quick to fire me. It’s too bad for little John that I can’t work with him as his PCA because his father is a criminal and I put the law before keeping my job. I have enough to take care of my getting an apt and keeping it for a few months. And I’m also lucky that I have another job lined up and that I work for a PCA agency now.

The second replacement job I have lined up is a job with Minneapolis Kids a summer and after school program. I had applied and interviewed for the position because Yahya had wanted John out of the house for the summer and into the Minneapolis Kids program, but they wouldn’t accept Little John in the program because they were understaffed to deal with his behaviors. As his PCA I applied because I had experience working with John, I got the job and it was only after that I was dismissed from being little John’s PCA.

At this point I’m not yet cleared to work with Minneapolis Kids because HR hasn’t finished my background check, and I’m not sure if little John will be attending the program because I will be there. But I do know that regardless of if John is there or not I will try to be at Minneapolis kids working everyday after I get cleared.

The summer program begins next week on the 14th and I’d get paid 12$ an hour after that,I’m looking forward to it beginning because the kids I saw were really great!

During the time I was working for Yahya and living with him and John I didn’t end my apt search. I had been looking at two bedrooms because my Mel and I wanted to go into a place together and I found a really great deal at a place on 16th and Vincent that I checked out. It is 250$ a month and I’d be given my own bedroom. I plan on moving in there on the 16th, there is a room for Mel if she wants it too.

For now I’m just playing a waiting game with HR and avoiding Yahya. I did report him to my PCA agency for asking for my paycheck and they told me that they’d find me someone else to work for in my area. Unbeknown to me my mother reported him to the section 8 people for lying on his lease that he has three people living in an apt where only his son and him live.

I’m hoping everything works out for me in these upcoming weeks with Minneapolis kids.

I’m in good spirits: Check this out, it made my day yesterday!